tres

i'm back, a brand new year, possibly a brand new start. brand new, really?
being the occasional optimist i could say i'm positive i've gained good, taking steps, despite them being tiny, towards becoming a greater person.
but brand new, really?

i took a look around, today, and then i realised.
it's probably just me. that whole positive difference taking steps thing. it's entirely internal.
because all around me, everything's just the same. ugly. filthy. and disgraceful.
maybe that world hasn't progressed so much. the ugly humanity, the world of snakes and scum. the world i was once upon a time a part of, because i didn't know how to perceive or think. or judge. the rightful way.

couldn't decide if i felt sorry for myself being here now, or sorry for the fact that it was so pathetic.
but in the end, the revelation was beautiful, that feeling of  yes, i know the truth, and it's not pretty, but the fact that i know it makes me feel amazing.

i don't want to be condescending. life is beautiful. people suck. but life's still awesome.

i'm going to keep at what i'm at.

god bless the rest :)


sunsets bring dawn eventually