One week

 

sunrise sky :)

The past month has been all topsy turvy with the whole study break, having to catch up with a whole year's workload, in 3 and a half weeks, and it was seriously no joke, and then dealing with some health issues, which I'm so glad is nothing too serious (I think) and then a lot of dealing with myself trying to escape studying and resorting to other unnecessary activities - like facebook and the whole food-escape.

Then dealing with the whole last minute omg! just one week to go and I haven't started anything proper yet!!! or, omg.. 2 days left what are you doing digging your own grave??

Seriously, once a procrastinator, always a procrastinator. It's like if you grew up through your childhood being a naughty kid who used to somehow push things to the last minute, and you've been doing it for years and somehow you keep pulling through, chances that you would NOW turn over a new leaf? seriously.. think again. Well that's at least the case for me.

And the exams. Which despite having the reputation of being someone who does well (probably like last century anyway haha) it was pretty sucky! 

And then it made me think, wow.. after the whole second year of daily feeling guilty about not studying, turning down great offers for the books etc.. and this is how I walk out of the exam hall feeling a mix between frustrated and disappointed. and worried (results).

But then again, if I were to look back at the year. 

I think it's been really quite an experience.

First of all, the most colourful year of my entire education experience. 

And in terms of personal development and learning lessons in life. Yeah for sure.

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The past year:

I made a decision (and a good one too) of escaping the routine I was bound to that was just killing me, by moving out. Which was really a breath of fresh air. It isn't as easy as compared to living with everything just provided to you so conveniently in hostel - but I LOVE this place a lot. And I've never felt more comfortable. So it was a good move. And I don't regret it. And I'm glad I did it. Something like good for the soul.

Learnt new things or at least tried to learn new things. Like feeding my hungry tummy and satisfying my sugar lust with kek batiks that were yumm and also occasionally cooking the something, whenever I had the time and energy. But not so consistent with this whole cooking thing. Most of the time I'm lazy. Plus delivery is so convenient. 

You get everything to your doorstep - whether it's a coffee, or two scoops of ice cream (baskin robbins), subway, indian food, local fast food, even bars offer liquor home delivery (which amuses me).

Developed certain good habits - like to never skip meals. I've been so consistent with meals, especially breakfast. Even if it's the day of exams, even if class is at 8am I make sure I get up and have at least 4-6 slices of bread with cheese and jam or nutella. Milk with hershey's choc sauce. And bring something along to snack on when I'm bored. Yes food is a luxury I will never deprive myself of. And frankly I do feel sorry for those who do. 

And other good habits, like walking more, doing my laundry, and keeping neat. Okay, no big deal sorta stuff. But still, good improvement.

Had my fair share of fun this year. Practically visited every corner of this entire place. The hilly areas the nearby beaches, the seas and the rivers and the lakes. Nearby weekend trips. Goa x 3 and Bangalore x 2. 

I've seen enough in India to know that I'm proud of being Malaysian. And to thank my lucky stars I'm blessed with so much that so many don't have.

Entertainment, including the indirectly entertaining things. Small daily things. Stalkers. Gosh. I don't wanna start on. Maybe some other time. And the daily musings. Watching cows feed on garbage dumpsters like stray dogs back home. Seriously, nothing holy about the cow. Most of the time it's really about enjoying the simple things in life, and it's what you make out of what you see. You choose how you feel, what you think, and what you believe. You're pretty much in charge. So life can be beautiful if you want it to be. And mine is awesome. And it's going to be awesomer :)

And of course, I've learnt a lot about myself, and what I can be, and I've developed internally as a person in so many ways. And I've learnt about people too. The ugly side of mankind. True colours of people I used to know. And how much I appreciate those who've stood by through thick and thin. And how to look at the bigger picture. And how to say No!, how to fight for your rights, how to not get sucked into the huge pit of lameness that most people are because they're afraid of being alone. And I've learnt to decide who and what is worth my time, and who and what isn't worth my time, and how to stay out. Do what you want, follow no crowd pressure. Stop being lame. It's healthy for your mind and your soul really. Really it was a lot of self-discovery.

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I'm definitely not the same as my 16 year old self.

But who and where I want to be --  I'm getting there. I'll be there.

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So after all said and done. 

Overall I think there was a good balance. But it was healthy. And it was necessary.

Wouldn't go back to change a thing. Don't regret anything.

Nothing lasts forever, but life is beautiful. Everything has a purpose.

The bigger picture and the small things. 

So you gain some and you lose some.

All in all, it was worth it.

Damn right it was.  

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So in a week's time :) Hello Malaysia!!! - back to the comfort of my home and country, it's going to be awesome I can feel it in my bones.